Stand up zone - Tell your best jokes here - Page 2

DA_VIPA · 11-20-2003, 09:24 AM

Is Windows a virus?
With the recent problems being encountered by Windows users all across the country, people are begin to ask themselves if windows is a virus. In response to the high demand for an answer to that question a study was done and concluded the following.

1. Viruses replicate quickly.
Windows does this.

2. Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so.
Windows does this.

3. Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk.
Windows does this.

4. Viruses are usually carried, unkown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems.
Windows does that too.

5. Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware.
Same with Windows, yet again.

Maybe Windows really is a virus.

Nope! There is a difference!

Viruses are well supported by their authors, are frequently updated, and tend to become more sophisticated as they mature. So there! Windows is not a virus.

Ikaruga · 11-20-2003, 09:33 AM

Wow...He accually figured that out all by himself...Man he's growing up so fast...

ledmonkey · 11-20-2003, 11:54 AM

Emkay good Micheal Jackson Joke!

Whats a simliarity between Micheal Jackson and Target.

Boys pants half off!! lol

asshole · 11-20-2003, 01:19 PM

[quote

ost_uid0="DA_VIPA"]Is Windows a virus?
With the recent problems being encountered by Windows users all across the country, people are begin to ask themselves if windows is a virus. In response to the high demand for an answer to that question a study was done and concluded the following.

1. Viruses replicate quickly.
Windows does this.

2. Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so.
Windows does this.

3. Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk.
Windows does this.

4. Viruses are usually carried, unkown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems.
Windows does that too.

5. Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware.
Same with Windows, yet again.

Maybe Windows really is a virus.

Nope! There is a difference!

Viruses are well supported by their authors, are frequently updated, and tend to become more sophisticated as they mature. So there! Windows is not a virus.[/quote]
Hahahaha, I like the j0ke, too bad it's not true..!!

DAMN YOU MAC USERS!!

11-20-2003, 03:16 PM

what did the computer geek say when he was drowning:
F1 F1!!

i was backed up in traffic one day in LA , and i got out to see what was wrong. It turns out that a trucker had gotten his trailer stuck under an overpass. So, I was standing there talking to the trucker, and a State potroleman walkes up. he asks the trucker "did 'ya git yer truck stuck?" the trucker replies "nope, i was hauling that overpass and ran outta gas!"

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11-20-2003, 09:33 AM	#12
Ikaruga Senior Member Junior Member Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 303 Post Thanks / Like Thanks (Given): 0 Thanks (Received): 0 Likes (Given): 0 Likes (Received): 0 Dislikes (Given): 0 Dislikes (Received): 0 Points: 0 Mentioned: 0 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s) Quoted: 0 Post(s)	Wow...He accually figured that out all by himself...Man he's growing up so fast... __________________ My thoughts do not dwell within the darkness of my past, yet I point my sword forward to reveal the light of my future.

11-20-2003, 11:54 AM	#13
ledmonkey Senior Member Senior Member Join Date: May 2003 Location: blar .......I mean blar? Posts: 4,076 Post Thanks / Like Thanks (Given): 0 Thanks (Received): 0 Likes (Given): 0 Likes (Received): 0 Dislikes (Given): 0 Dislikes (Received): 0 Points: 0 Mentioned: 0 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s) Quoted: 0 Post(s)	Emkay good Micheal Jackson Joke! Whats a simliarity between Micheal Jackson and Target. Boys pants half off!! lol __________________ [img:sig_uid]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v215/ledmonkey/badboyz.jpg[/img:sig_uid] ^^^My sucky old banner from last year... [b:sig_uid]<span style='font-size:17pt;line-height:100%'>Do you like cookies?[/b:sig_uid]</span> <form> <input type="checkbox" name="Yes"> <input type="checkbox" name="No"> <input type="submit" value="Submit"> </form

11-20-2003, 01:19 PM	#14
asshole Senior Member Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 4,729 Post Thanks / Like Thanks (Given): 0 Thanks (Received): 0 Likes (Given): 0 Likes (Received): 0 Dislikes (Given): 0 Dislikes (Received): 0 Points: 0 Mentioned: 0 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s) Quoted: 0 Post(s)	[quoteost_uid0="DA_VIPA"]Is Windows a virus? With the recent problems being encountered by Windows users all across the country, people are begin to ask themselves if windows is a virus. In response to the high demand for an answer to that question a study was done and concluded the following. 1. Viruses replicate quickly. Windows does this. 2. Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so. Windows does this. 3. Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk. Windows does this. 4. Viruses are usually carried, unkown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems. Windows does that too. 5. Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware. Same with Windows, yet again. Maybe Windows really is a virus. Nope! There is a difference! Viruses are well supported by their authors, are frequently updated, and tend to become more sophisticated as they mature. So there! Windows is not a virus.[/quote] Hahahaha, I like the j0ke, too bad it's not true..!! DAMN YOU MAC USERS!! __________________ [img:sig_uid]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v135/XxElPeCaDoRxX/zorade.gif[/img:sig_uid] I don't put my heart on women, I put my hard-on on women!

11-20-2003, 09:24 AM	#11
DA_VIPA Senior Member Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: ...haha u cant find me Posts: 2,364 Post Thanks / Like Thanks (Given): 0 Thanks (Received): 0 Likes (Given): 0 Likes (Received): 0 Dislikes (Given): 0 Dislikes (Received): 0 Points: 0 Mentioned: 0 Post(s) Tagged: 0 Thread(s) Quoted: 0 Post(s)	Is Windows a virus? With the recent problems being encountered by Windows users all across the country, people are begin to ask themselves if windows is a virus. In response to the high demand for an answer to that question a study was done and concluded the following. 1. Viruses replicate quickly. Windows does this. 2. Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so. Windows does this. 3. Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk. Windows does this. 4. Viruses are usually carried, unkown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems. Windows does that too. 5. Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware. Same with Windows, yet again. Maybe Windows really is a virus. Nope! There is a difference! Viruses are well supported by their authors, are frequently updated, and tend to become more sophisticated as they mature. So there! Windows is not a virus.

11-20-2003, 03:16 PM	#15
Guest Posts: n/a Post Thanks / Like Thanks (Given): Thanks (Received): Likes (Given): Likes (Received): Dislikes (Given): Dislikes (Received): Points: 0 Mentioned: Post(s) Tagged: Thread(s) Quoted: Post(s)	what did the computer geek say when he was drowning: F1 F1!! i was backed up in traffic one day in LA , and i got out to see what was wrong. It turns out that a trucker had gotten his trailer stuck under an overpass. So, I was standing there talking to the trucker, and a State potroleman walkes up. he asks the trucker "did 'ya git yer truck stuck?" the trucker replies "nope, i was hauling that overpass and ran outta gas!"