101 reasons it's better to be a guy - Check this out...lol

[Karnage]

<center>101 Reasons It's Better To Be A Guy</center>

1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat
2. Movie nudity is 95% female.
3. You know stuff about tanks.
4. A 5-day vacationi requires only one suitcase
5. Monday Night Football
6. Monday Night R.A.W.
7. You don't have to monitor your friends' sex lives
8. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter
9. You can open all your own jars.
10. Old friends don't give a damn whether you lost or gained weight.
11. Dry cleaners and hair cutters don't rob you blind.
12. When clicking through the channels, you don't have to stall at every shot of somebody crying.
13. All your orgasms are real.
14. Your ass is never a factor in job interviews
15. A beer gut doesn't make you invisible to the opposite sex.
16. You don't have to lug a bag of useful stuff around everywhere you go.
17. You understand why Stripes is funny.
18. Guys in hockey masks don't attack you (unless you smash them into the boards).
19. You can go to the bathroom w/o a support group.
20. Your last name stays put.
21. You can leave the hotel bed unmade.
22. When your work is criticized, you don't have to panic that everyone secretly hates you.
23. You can kill your own food.
24. The garage is all yours.
25. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfullness.
26. You see the humor in Terms of Endearment
27. Nobody secretly wonders whether you swallow.
28. You never have to clean a toilet.
29. Sex means never worrying about your reputation.
30. You can be showered and ready to go in 10 minutes.
31. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
32. Your underwear is $10 for a 3-pack
33. The National College Cheerleading Championship
34. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend
35. You don't have to shave below your neck.
36. None of your co-workers has the power to make you cry
37. You don't have to curl up next to a hairy ass every night
38. You can write your name in the snow.
39. If you're 34 and single, no one even notices.
40. You can get into a non-trivial pissing contest.
41. Everything on your face gets to stay its original color.
42. Chocolate is just another snack
43. You can be president (in this lifetime).
44. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat.
45. Flowers fix everything
46. You never have to worry about other people's feelings.
47. You get to think about sex 90% of your working hours.
48. You can wear a white shirt to a water park.
49. Three pairs of shoes is more than enough
50. You can eat a banana in a hardware store.
51. You can say anything ("Wow, do my balls itch!") and not worry about what people will think.
52. Foreplay is optional.
53. Michael Bolton doesn't live in your universe.
54. You can whip your shirt off on a hot day.
55. Nobody stops telling a dirty joke when you enter a room.
56. You never feel compelled to stop a pal from getting leid.
57. You don't have to clean your apartment just because the meter-reader's coming by.
58. Car mechanics tell you the truth
59. You don't give a rat's ass if anyone notices your new haircut.
60. You can quietly watch a game w/your buddy for hours w/o ever thinking he must be mad at me.
61. The world is your urinal.
62. You getto jump up and slap stuff
63. You never misconstrue innocuous statements to mean your lover's about to leave you.
64. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
65. One mood, all the time!
66. You can admire Clint Eastwood without starving yourself to look like him.
67. You never have to drive on to another gas station 'caus this one's just too skeevy.
68. You know at least 20 ways to open a beer bottle.
69. You can sit w/your knees apart no matter what you're wearing.
70. Same work...more pay!
71. Gray hair and wrinkles only add to character.
72. Wedding dress: $2000. Tuxedo rental: $75
73. You don't care if someone's talking about you behind your back.
74. You don't need to leave the room to make an emergency crotch adjustment.
75. With 400 billion sperm per shot, you could double the earth's population in 15 tries, in theory.
76. You don't mooch off of others' desserts.
77. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
78. The remote control is yours, and yours alone.
79. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.
80. ESPN's SportsCenter.
81. You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
82. Bachelor parties whomp ass over bridal showers.
83. You have a normal and healthy relationship with your mother.
84. You can buy condoms w/o the shopkeeper imagining you naked.
85. You don't need to pretend you're "freshening up" to go to the bathroom.
86. If you don't call your buddy when you say you will, he wont' tell your other friend you've changed.
87. You can rationalize any behavior with the handy phrase "Fhuck it."
88. Someday you'll be a dirty old man.
89. If another guy shows up at the party with the same outfit, you just might become lifelong buddies.
90. Princess Di's death was just another obituary.
91. An occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
92. You never have to miss a sexual opportunity because you're not in the mood.
93. You think the idea of punting a small dog is funny (hell, you're prolly laughing right now )
94. If something mechanical doesn't work, you can hit it with a hammer or throw it across the room.
95. New shoes don't blister, cut, and mangle your feet.
96. Pornos are designed with your mind in mind.
97. You don't need to remember everybody's birthdays and anniversaries.
98. Not liking a person doesn't preclude having great sex with them.
99. Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with "So...notice anything different?"
100. There's always a game on somewhere.
101. Baywatch.

<center>10 Reasons It Sucks To Be A Guy</center>
1. You have to take out the garbage.
2. The Ferrari 550 Maranello lists for over $200,000.
3. No sofas in your restrooms.
4. External genitalia are vulnerable to knees and fastballs.
5. Even if you get your head caught in an industrial wood chipper, you're not allowed to cry.
6. James Bond movies only come out every two years.
7. Ribbed for her pleasure--not for yours.
8. You have to wear ties.
9. You can't flirt your way out of a jam.
10. "Women and children first!"

[Unknown666]

MAAAAN! That's too freakin many, MAN! Sh*t! I don't know if you mentioned that we also have balls, man. Whooooa! :0
hehehe... :laughlong:

[marvel911]

Some of those are pretty funny..(haha punting a small dog :lol

[SBYRD5]

Baywatch..hmm

You missed one

102.When you fight people picture you hurting the other person not you having sex with the oher person.
(Guy vs Guy normal....Girl vs Girl...love to see.... :biggrin)

[Ludacris]

I read 32 of them then I just stopped........anyway......it's funny and yet true :biggrin:

[AXE]

Lmao. thats F#ucken funny.

[DarkOmega]

man is so true guys are better by far

[TJ5]

...... err This is gonna make the girls mad ..... lol...

[Ludacris]

[quoteost_uid0="DarkOmega"]man is so true guys are better by far[/quote]
nah gurls aren't better, it's just that guys can get out of things more easily than gurls......I mean with cann burp and no one will care U know.......anyway.......

peopel I don't burp in front of people lol :biggrin:

[AngelWings]

both genders have diff things that may seem like they're better than the other, but both are really equal in their own little way. so just to prove my point...so b/c u posted 101 reasons why guyz r better than girlz, then i guess itz not wrong to say 101 reasons why girlz r better rite?

101. We're beautiful
100. We're smarter
99. If there's something wrong with our face, we can fix it
98. We have fashion sense
97. We have tact
96. If we're horny its not obvious
95. We're polite
94. We can have long hair and not look weird
93. We're not dense when it comes to relationships
92. We don't have d**ks
91. We can wear skirts
90. When we see a hot guy we don't pitch a tent in our pants
89. We get what we want and we don't have to beg
88. We can get out of traffic tickets
87. If we're too short we can make ourselves taller
86. God made Eve to MAKE UP for Adam
85. We can't get prostate cancer
84. We don't look stupid when we dance at parties
83. We're allowed to hit boys but boys aren't allowed to hit back
82. You can look but you can't touch
81. If we burp, its not as obvious and gross when a guy does
80. If we need help with something, it doesn't look weird when we ask
79. Unlike the cops, we always get our man
78. We don't have to be ripped to be attractive
77. We'll never get receding hairlines
76. We may fart but we never get blamed
75. We have an excuse for bad days
74. Guys can propose, but we have the final choice
73. We go to a beauty salon, not a barber
72. We're from Venus... apparently
71. We don't have to pay for dates
70. We don't get potbellies
69. We have more things to play with (make up, purses..)
68. Our voices don't crack in puberty
67. We have a special bond with our kids
66. If we're Jewish, we don't have to get circumcised
65. We don't need to eat 8 cheeseburgers to be full
64. Animals like us
63. Guys come to us
62. Penis envy isn't a problem for us
61. Nail Polish
60. It doesn't hurt to ride a bike
59. When we have boobs, its normal, when guys have boobs, well thats just wrong
58. We're not expected to know how to fix stuff
57. We don't sweat nearly as much
56. We'll NEVER be a "dirty old man"
55. Shopping is fun, not work
54. We can train guys
53. If we're short, it doesn't stop guys from asking us out
52. We'll never go bald
51. We can stop and ask for directions
50. We don't name our body parts
49. We can slap your butts and you can't stop us
48. We have finer tastes
47. To us, beer is an acquired taste
46. It takes more than guns and gore to entertain us
45. We don't need to do everything to get attention
44. We don't need to beat someone up to feel good
43. We can be conniving and manipulative and not be evil
42. We chew our food before we swallow it
41. We CAN turn you down even if you are hot
40. Its not obvious when we're lying
39. We don't have to be gay to shop
38. We don't have to be macho
37. Girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice
36. We don't need instant replay to remember the score
35. Green M&Ms are just M&Ms
34. We can shave our legs without playing a certain sport
33. The Damsel in Distress always gets rescued
32. We get more out of a romance movie then... "did you see the breasts on THAT!?"
31. Our pants aren't loose enough to fall down
30. Dolls are made to look like us
29. We're better kissers
28. We're allowed to giggle
27. We have smooth skin
26. In Saudi Arabia we can marry as many men as we want
25. We can scream
24. Football's a game, not an obsession
23. Boys have cooties
22. Pink is allowed
21. We can sing without people laughing at us (most of the time anyways)
20. Lip Gloss
19. We can borrow guys clothes
18. We're not too proud to cry
17. Just because we like a guy doesn't mean we think about having sex with him, or want to for that matter...
16. Our talents go beyond burping and farting
15. We're ALWAYS innocent
14. We can say hi without punching each other
13. Most guys would give us the shirt off their backs
12. It doesn't matter if we suck at sports
11. Girls can wear guys clothes and not be gay
10. We don't have hairy chests
9. We're allowed to be scared
8. Doors are opened for us
7. We can give 'the look'
6. We can start wars with our beauty (Helen of Troy, Cleopatra, the list goes on...)
5. We get flowers and candy
4. We get to sit down when we pee
3. We can be creative with our formal wear
2. With guys, you can tell when they're gay
1. Men can't live without women