You're no "n00b"... all you did was put the topic in the wrong section.
As far as you not being able to connect with your mates, try and run through a few checks. Is there any one of you connecting through the internet from behind a router ??
If so, then some changes to the default settings would have to be made. You should go to the network tab in the Options portion, and click on "I am behind a firewall or Proxy" option and the old connection mode.
Note that this would make you unable to host or challenge others to a game. So you'll have to join games or accept challenges. If ALL your mates are behind routers, then there's nothing we can do. Someone would just have to unhook his/her router so that the others can join :biggrin:
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