[quote:post_uid0="_-_Diablo_-_"]This is a dis
some1 is cursing at u 1st u let him finish after he/she's done u say

''U can call me anything u want eccept *persons name*''
;)[/quote]
Thats funny....call me a n.o.o.b. just don't call me _-_Diablo_-_. :biggrin:
------------------------------------------------------------
You know whats really funny how KKS name now always comes up as KidKrazypoop.

[quote:post_uid0="DA_VIPA"]ooooh ok has jackass the movie come out in usa?[/quote]
does that even need an answer?

Yes....

i told you i'm the funniest :laughlong:

snake it was a yes/no question im waiting for it 2 come out here...

There was this construction worker on the 3rd floor of this unfinished building. He needed a hand saw, but was too lazy to go down and get it himself, so he tried to call his fellow worker on the ground to get it for him, but this guy could not hear a word he said. So he started to give a sign so the guy on the ground could understand him.
First he pointed at his eyes (meaning "I") then pointed at his knees (meaning "need), and moved his hand back and forth describing the movement of a hand saw.
Finally, the guy on the ground started nodding his head like he understood and dropped his pants and started to jerk off.
The guy on the 3rd floor got pissed-off and ran down to the ground and started yelling at this guy, "You idiot, I was trying to tell you I needed a hand saw."
The other guy replied, "I know, I was trying to tell you that I was coming."

lol...... :lol:
bro where do you gat all this?

my dad, cousins and my friends bro u got any jokes? post some we might find funny but i never run out of material mwahahahahahaha....

There was a guy riding through the desert on his camel. He had been travelling so long that he felt the need to have sex. Obviously there were no women in the desert so the man turned to his camel.
He tried to position himself to have sex with his camel but the camel ran away. The man ran to catch up to the camel and got back on and started to ride again. Soon he was feeling the urge to have sex again so once again he turned to his camel. The camel refused by running away. So he caught up to it again and go on it again.
Finally after riding the camel through the whole desert the man came to a road. There was a broken down car with three big chested beautiful blondes sitting in it.
He went up to them and asked the women if they needed any help.
The hottest girl said ,"If you fix our car we will do anything you want."
The man luckily knew a thing or two about cars and fixed it in a flash.
When he finished are three girls asked, "How could we ever repay you Mr."
After thinking for a short while he replied,"Could you hold my camel?"

vipa wheres ur common sense?

a domestic movie made in its own country will be released in its own country! for example: harry potter[lord knows i hate it] was made in london and was released in london first.

jesus man dubya tee eff!! all u had 2 say was YES!! dont ask for my common sense coz i aint got none.. :laugh:

that movie came out last year.

thats it, i done talking.

last year!!?? dame man...

heres a dumb one

ur so stupid u tried to shut a revolving door

coolplayer u really shouldnt be talkin to yourself... :laugh: j.k anywayz.....

A man who just got a raise decides to buy a new scope for his rifle. He goes to a rifle shop, and asks the clerk to show him a scope.
The clerk takes out a scope, and says to the man, "This scope is so good, you can see my house all the way up on that hill."
The man takes a look through the scope, and starts laughing.
"What's so funny?" asks the clerk.
"I see a naked man and a naked woman running around in the house." the man replies.
The clerk grabs the scope from the man, and looks at his house. Then he hands two bullets to the man and says, "Here are two bullets, I'll give you this scope for nothing if you take these two bullets, shoot my wife's head off and shoot the guy's dick off."
The man takes another look through the scope and says, "You know what? I think I can do that with one shot!"

u ppl are sooo borin man why is it always me doin the dirty jokes? can some1 plz make me laugh? .. ??? i doubt it but atleast have a try .....


It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighbourhood.
When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope.
At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars. The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.
At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door, and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced.
When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee.
As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge. "All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?"
"Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you."
He said, "F.u.ck him, give him a dollar."
The lady then said, "The breakfast was my idea."

i know that 1 bro :D

hey bro ur a funny guy why dont u post sum jokes eh??

tell me what you think

it was a tournment of 3 bat's who gat's more blood
1st one go......... and come back and the bat's seen all his head in blood so the bat's ask him where did you gat all this blood so he seying you see this tree after the tree it is a city and i sact all the blood form the ppl .
2nd one go.......... come back and the bat's seen almost all his body with blood . so the bat's ask him where did you gat all this blood so he seying you see this tree after it was a city and after the city it was a bigger city so i sact all the ppl in the big city.
3rd go ............. come back and the bat's seen his all body with blood so the batd's ask him where did you gat all this blood so he seying you see this tree.so the bat's seying yes.<span style='font-size:12pt;line-height:100%'> i didnt</span>

huh....could u explain that 1 a lil bro... ???

you know the bat didnt see the tree so he gat bang on it and gat back with his all body with blood

so its really the bats own blood thats on himself lol yea i get it

yea....... lol :laughlong: :D

ok bro lets stop spammin before some1 sez somthin ok? lol :laugh: but it aint spammin if its a joke so....

A pianist was hired to play background music for a movie. When it was completed he asked when and where he could see the picture. The producer sheepishly confessed that it was actually a porno film and it was due out in a month.
A month later, the musician went to a porno theatre to see it. With his collar up and dark glasses on, he took a seat in the back row, next to a couple who also seemed to be in disguise.
The movie was even raunchier than he had feared, featuring group sex, S/M and even a dog.
After a while, the embarrassed pianist turned to the couple and said, "I'm only here to listen to the music."
"Yeah?" replied the man. "We're only here to see our dog."

errr ....heeeelloooooo!!! *echo* *echo* damn u ppl are really boring jeez.....
A husband, one bright sunny morning, turns to his lovely wife, "Wife, we're going fishing this weekend, you, me and the dog."
The wife grimaces, "But I don't like fishing!"
"Look! We're going fishing and that's final."
"Do I have to go fishing with you... I really don't want to go!"
"Right I'll give you three choices... 1 You come fishing with me and the dog... 2 You give me a BLOW JOB.... 3 or you take it up the ass!"
The wife grimaces again, "But I don't want to do any of those things!"
"Wife I've given you three options.. You'll HAVE to do one of them! I'm going to the garage to sort out my fishing tackle, when I come back I expect you to have made up your mind!"
The wife sits and thinks about it.
Twenty minutes later her husband comes back, "Well! What have you decided? FISHING with me and the dog, BLOW JOB, or ass?"
The wife complains some more and finally makes up her mind, "O.K. I'll give you a blow job!"
"Great!" He says and drops his pants. The wife is on her knees doing the business. Suddenly she stops, looks up at her Husband, "Oh! It tastes absolutely disgusting... It tastes all poopty!"
"Yes!" says her husband "The dog didn't want to go fishing either."

joy to the world, the teacher dead.
we barber-q the head.
what happen to the body?
we flushed it down the potty.
round & round it goes, round & round it goes...........


sorry, lisa never let nelson finish. it was funny.

ahhh a classic pimpson moment........DOH!! lol at least someone posted...

An escaped convict broke into a house and tied up a young couple who had been sleeping in the bedroom. As soon as he had a chance, the husband turned to his voluptuous young wife, bound-up on the bed in a skimpy nightgown, and whispered,
"Honey, this guy hasn't seen a woman in years. Just cooperate with anything he wants. If he wants to have sex with you, just go along with it and pretend you like it. Our lives depend on it!"
"Dear," the wife hissed, spitting out her gag, "I'm so relieved you feel that way, because he just told me he thinks you have a nice, tight butt!"

lol good one

A young man was walking down the street when he notice a shortman in green. The lil man poped up and said to him hello laddy. The man replied umm hello. The lil man then said I am a Leprechaun I can give u gold,cars,house,diamonds,girls and riches beyond your mind. But, the lil leprechuan said, I have been around the world so i havnt gottin any in along time. So I just want a lil bump in the back. The man in disguse said WHAT! no no way man. But the leprechuan said I will give u gold, cars, houses, daimonds, girls, and riches beyond your mind. Um I dont know the man said, then the leprechuan went on I will give u pot of gold,fame,women, and things beyond your mind. Uh well the man started to think, well ok.
So the leprechuan got a stool hoped up and the man pulled his pants down. The leprechuan started to do his thing. So laddy the leprechuan said how old are u. Umm ah 25 the man said back. Ha your 25 years old and u still believe in leprechuans. :biggrin:

got sum ganja, it is a beauty.
very special, really and truly.
take good take of me, that is ur duty.
want u right by my side, night and day........

no letting go, no holding back.
because u r my baby.
when i am with u its all a that.
bag, i so glad i bought u.
No letting go No holding back
No holding Back no
When I'm with you it's all a that
All a that


They say good things must come to an end
But I'm optimistic about being your friend
u make me feel so good, by my doings
With Keisha and Annesha but that
Was back then

no letting go, no holding back.
because u r my baby.
when i am with u its all a that.
bag, i so glad i bought u.
No letting go No holding back
No holding Back no
When I'm with you it's all a that
All a that

really appretiate u drugging me, after all that we been through.
REALLY APPRETIATE u drugging me, all times, tiiiiimmimeess.

got sum ganja, it is a beauty.
very special, really and truly.
take good take of me, that is ur duty.
want u right by my side, night and day........

no letting go, no holding back.
because u r my baby.
when i am with u its all a that.
bag, i so glad i bought u.
No letting go No holding back
No holding Back no
When I'm with you it's all a that
All a that.

[quote:post_uid0="DA_VIPA"]ahhh a classic pimpson moment........DOH!! lol at least someone posted...

An escaped convict broke into a house and tied up a young couple who had been sleeping in the bedroom. As soon as he had a chance, the husband turned to his voluptuous young wife, bound-up on the bed in a skimpy nightgown, and whispered,
"Honey, this guy hasn't seen a woman in years. Just cooperate with anything he wants. If he wants to have sex with you, just go along with it and pretend you like it. Our lives depend on it!"
"Dear," the wife hissed, spitting out her gag, "I'm so relieved you feel that way, because he just told me he thinks you have a nice, tight butt!"[/quote]
good one bro :lol:

nice lil weed poem snake did ya make it up yourself or did ya copy some1 else??....

A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper.
Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 35," was the reply.
"I'm actually 47," the man says happily.
A little while later he goes to McDonald's for lunch and asks the order taker the same question, to which the reply is, "I'd guess that you're 29?"
"Nope, I am actually 47." He's starting to feel really good about himself.
While standing at the bus stop he asks an old woman the same question.
She replies, "I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young there was a sure way of telling a man's age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with your penis for ten minutes I will be able to tell your exact age."
As there was no one else around the man thought what the hell and let her slip her hand down his pants.
Ten minutes later the old lady says, "OK, it's done. You are 47,"
Stunned the man says, "That was brilliant! How did you do that?"
The old lady replies, "I was behind you in McDonald's".

i dont want to spam but this $hit is good :lol:

im the joke king!! get it ??..lol nvm

its my remix of a song called 'no letting go' by wayne wonder.

[quote:post_uid0="DA_VIPA"]nice lil weed poem snake did ya make it up yourself or did ya copy some1 else??....

A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper.
Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 35," was the reply.
"I'm actually 47," the man says happily.
A little while later he goes to McDonald's for lunch and asks the order taker the same question, to which the reply is, "I'd guess that you're 29?"
"Nope, I am actually 47." He's starting to feel really good about himself.
While standing at the bus stop he asks an old woman the same question.
She replies, "I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young there was a sure way of telling a man's age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with your penis for ten minutes I will be able to tell your exact age."
As there was no one else around the man thought what the hell and let her slip her hand down his pants.
Ten minutes later the old lady says, "OK, it's done. You are 47,"
Stunned the man says, "That was brilliant! How did you do that?"
The old lady replies, "I was behind you in McDonald's".[/quote]
hahaha what a rip off!!!!!!

rip off ?? w/e ....

A man and his wife are returning from holiday, while on holiday they decided to buy themselves some pets, he bought a snake while the woman got a skunk.
As they are passing through airport control they notice a sign which says
"NO ANIMALS WILL BE ALLOWED THROUGH QUARANTINE"
Slightly distressed the woman turns to her husband and asks what they should do. After thinking hard for 5 minutes the man come up with a plan
"what I'll do is tie the snake around my waist and try to pretend that it's a snake skin belt"
"Yes" the woman replies "but what about the skunk?"
"I don't know, you'll just have to hide it up your skirt"
"but what about the smell?" the woman asks.
To which the man replies "Look, if it dies it dies!"

Two young lovers go up to the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. When they get there, the guy goes out to chop some wood. When he gets back, he says, "Honey, my hands are freezing!"
She says, "Well, put them here between my thighs and that will warm them up."
After lunch he goes back out to chop some more wood and comes back and says again, "Man! my hands are really freezing!"
She says again, "Well, put them here between my thighs and warm them up." He does, and again that warms him up.
After dinner, he goes out one more time to chop some wood to get them through the night. When he returns, he says again, "Honey, my hands are really, really freezing!"
She looks at him and says, "For crying out loud, don't your ears ever get cold?"