I got in contact with alcohol - *hiccup* [Archive]

Ikaruga

02-02-2004, 05:44 PM

*sups somemore beer*

Why hello...*hiccup* I'm Mr. Biggles...But you can call me...you can call me...uhh...um.........

Uhhh.....*hiccup* Lemme tell you a story...

I was like...In my room...you know...on my computer...lookin up porn....spammin ppl...*hiccup* Till one day...My mom came in...and told me to um...wash the dishes see,...And I told her...*hiccup* That I um....I ummm...Didn't feel like it...

And then...*hiccup*...She turned off the computer...see? And then um...then she started yellin at me...She called me all kinds of stuff...Then, all hell broke loose...*hiccup*...When she was done yellin...She told me to umm...She told me...Uhh... To wash the dishes right now...And I told her to...

CLEAN 'EM YOURSELF! CLEAN 'EM YOURSELF!!!

And guess what...*hiccup* I have not seen my mom ever since that day...And umm...Somehow...I ended up...In this cool place...Called umm....Uhh...The Adoption Center...Yeah...

So that's how it all happened...Uhh...goodnight.

*falls on floor*

akuma_forever

02-02-2004, 05:48 PM

I reccomend that you stop making these stupid topics. I understand that this is random insanity, but this is taking it WAY to far...

$ilent K!ller

02-02-2004, 05:48 PM

rrrrrriiiigggghhhttttt ??? ...........did that really happen :shocked: :laughlong:

akuma_forever

02-02-2004, 05:50 PM

Of course it didnt happen...

$ilent K!ller

02-02-2004, 05:52 PM

i know i was just kidding :laughlong:

devilsoul

02-02-2004, 06:01 PM

I reccomend that you stop making these stupid topics. I understand that this is random insanity, but this is taking it WAY to far...
right......LIGHTEN UP........HES TRYING TO HAVE FUN :shocked:

ledmonkey

02-02-2004, 06:06 PM

But its not even funny......it might be funny to like a ten year old:P

Ikaruga

02-03-2004, 05:20 AM

Oh s-s-screw you...

Lemme-lemme tell ya another story...*hiccup*

I was with my aunt see...And umm...I was on the computer...But...umm...uhh...the internet was broken...And I was bored...So...I started jumpin on my bed and everything...Then...um...I fell...on my computer...And started yellin...

AUNT RUTHY! AUNT RUTHY! THERE'S KETCHUP ON THE COMPUTER!!!

And umm...Everything blacked out...and...umm....I was in the Hospitable place you know...and...I'm gonna tell you another story...

*pulls out another 6 pack of beer* :p

chicken_wing

02-03-2004, 05:49 AM

Ikaruga you really need to stop,it wasnt even funny form the begging and just like akuma said just stop making dumb topics before you get flammed more.
It will be best if you just lock the this topic before you get flammed more :biggrin:

SBYRD5

02-03-2004, 07:18 AM

Oh s-s-screw you...

Lemme-lemme tell ya another story...*hiccup*

I was with my aunt see...And umm...I was on the computer...But...umm...uhh...the internet was broken...And I was bored...So...I started jumpin on my bed and everything...Then...um...I fell...on my computer...And started yellin...

AUNT RUTHY! AUNT RUTHY! THERE'S KETCHUP ON THE COMPUTER!!!

And umm...Everything blacked out...and...umm....I was in the Hospitable place you know...and...I'm gonna tell you another story...

*pulls out another 6 pack of beer* :p
OMG hahahaha :laughlong: :laugh:

It's funny to me in a weird way not that he said is funny it's more like laugh at him funny..to contrast to laugh with him...LOL :laughlong:

Edited By SBYRD5 on Feb. 03 2004 at 10:19

Saijin_Ryu

02-03-2004, 07:56 AM

*sups somemore beer*

Why hello...*hiccup* I'm Mr. Biggles...But you can call me...you can call me...uhh...um.........

Uhhh.....*hiccup* Lemme tell you a story...

I was like...In my room...you know...on my computer...lookin up porn....spammin ppl...*hiccup* Till one day...My mom came in...and told me to um...wash the dishes see,...And I told her...*hiccup* That I um....I ummm...Didn't feel like it...

And then...*hiccup*...She turned off the computer...see? And then um...then she started yellin at me...She called me all kinds of stuff...Then, all hell broke loose...*hiccup*...When she was done yellin...She told me to umm...She told me...Uhh... To wash the dishes right now...And I told her to...

CLEAN 'EM YOURSELF! CLEAN 'EM YOURSELF!!!

And guess what...*hiccup* I have not seen my mom ever since that day...And umm...Somehow...I ended up...In this cool place...Called umm....Uhh...The Adoption Center...Yeah...

So that's how it all happened...Uhh...goodnight.

*falls on floor*
Wow, you drink alcohol you must think of your-self as really really cool, i admire that and i want to become more cool like you.

:baaa:

ledmonkey

02-03-2004, 11:53 AM

The kids twelve he doesn't understand that stuff isn't funny:P

Ikaruga

02-03-2004, 06:03 PM

W-why are you being such a jerk...I mean...I'm just postin man! You dont have to be an asshole about everything I post Ok?...I mean..if you cant say nothin nice...dont say nothin at all...

Now to the other story...

I was in my room...see...And umm...I was playin my super nintendo...Since my mom was on welfare...Kay? now this is what happened...She came in my room...yellin about my poor-ass grades...And I pretended...I was listening....Then...She threw my nintendo...out of the window...

Then...

She threw me down the steps...and sat me down at the table...with a sheet of paper...and a broken pencil...And she had me...spell my name...100 times...and for everytime I spelled it wrong...She'd bitch-slap me....And so...I NEVER SPELLED IT RIGHT...And guess what...my name was um...Chris...And what I spelled...was Arnold...Swartzenegger...I was suprised..That I could spell his name right...

And so...we were up all night...I kept spellin my name wrong...And she kept slapping me...until the next day....

*pulls out a truckload of beer*

Man these are good...

Edited By Ikaruga on Feb. 03 2004 at 21:05

$ilent K!ller

02-03-2004, 06:11 PM

Now to the other story...

I was in my room...see...And umm...I was playin my super nintendo...Since my mom was on welfare...Kay? now this is what happened...She came in my room...yellin about my poor-ass grades...And I pretended...I was listening....Then...She threw my nintendo...out of the window...

Then...

She threw me down the steps...and sat me down at the table...with a sheet of paper...and a broken pencil...And she had me...spell my name...100 times...and for everytime I spelled it wrong...She'd bitch-slap me....And so...I NEVER SPELLED IT RIGHT...And guess what...my name was um...Chris...And what I spelled...was Arnold...Swartzenegger...I was suprised..That I could spell his name right...

And so...we were up all night...I kept spellin my name wrong...And she kept slapping me...until the next day....

*pulls out a truckload of beer*

Man these are good...
man if my mama slaped me id slap her back.....then id run :laughlong:

wolvamat

02-04-2004, 02:05 AM

I mean..if you cant say nothin nice...dont say nothin at all...
:lol: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA lol u listening to the teachers at shool to much! that was the lamest thing u could of said

Ikaruga

02-04-2004, 05:29 AM

How did...How did you know...I mean...Oh geese...The teachers did say that...Erm...Uhh...Lemme tell you another story...

I was at school...a.k.a. the hell hole...And umm...I was in class for 1st period...And then...there were these 7 dudes...you know...they were talkin...then the looked at me...And I said "wassup" like anyone would say...Then the bell for 2nd period rang...And then...the 7 dudes were following me...1 of them...tripped me...and then I fell...

And then...

THEY JUMPED ME...ALL 7 OF THEM JUMPED ME LIKE A FRIGGIN TRAMPOLINE...And they kept jumpin me...until after school...

Now my teacher...saw the whole thing...and..she didnt do anything...because she hated me...and all of the other kids in her class...I mean...She was a huge biatch...

So I crawled home...looking like a hobo...It's friggin hilarious...

And then...out of the bushes...SOME 3RD GRADERS JUMPED ME...

*Chris, your dinner is ready!*
I cant come to dinner mom...

*Chris, get down here and eat right now!!!*

NO MOM, I'M ON THE COMPUTER!!!

*Mom starts stomping up the starts*

OH GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE.... :shocked:

ledmonkey

02-04-2004, 11:54 AM

All I'm sayin is that its not funny......

EvilAkuma

02-04-2004, 01:20 PM

he just lieing that he drinking alcohol and he lieing about the story to. He just want to make ya think it real. Imagine drinking alcohol and u go to school and ur over there hiccuping or at home getting in trouble. Dude i been drinking alcohol and that happen to me. I get in trouble

Ikaruga

02-04-2004, 03:45 PM

All I'm sayin is that its not funny......
If it's not funny to you...Than that's fine...No one cares if it isn't funny to you...

Oh wait she's still comin up the stairs...*locks door*

*CHRIS YOU OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW!!!*

Gotta run...*pulls out laptop*

*Mom busts down door*
CHRIS!!!

Bye Bye! *jumps out window*

YOU'LL NEVER GET AWAY FROM ME!!

*runs away* Whew...glad that's over...Now All I have to do is head to the local liquer..I MEAN Grocery Store...

marvel911

02-04-2004, 06:27 PM

What the hell?..Ledmonkey makes more sense than whats going on in here...

ledmonkey

02-04-2004, 06:38 PM

Hes trying to make jokes but he is failing.....

Ikaruga

02-05-2004, 04:41 PM

*In gas station*

I'd like a pack of beer...and some...a pack of...Malboro..

Cashier: My I see your ID?

...What ID...

Cashier: Your driver's license please..

Oh....Oh that! Oh I have it...*pulls out fake ID*

Cashier: Um...Sir...This isn't real..

Huh...what are you talking about...

Cashier: This picture looks nothing like you sir...This is a picture of an Asian person...

What? I had my arm shot off in Veitnom!

Cashier:....

And a makeover!

Cashier: Oh...Here's your change sir.

Oh yeah...Come to daddy..

*walks out*
Why are you guy looking at me like that...I didn't go to the liquer store....

Ok, here's another story...

It was a saturday, I was watchin old episodes of dragon ball z...watchin goku get his ass kicked...Till one of my homeboys threw a rock at my window to get my attention.

(And it broke...)

*Yo Chris! Come on out so we could hag out at the bar!*

I TOLD YOU NOT TO CALL ME CHRIS...

*Sorry!*

So I went with my pals to meet up with some of our colleages at a local bar, I went with my fake ID...

Drunk Dude: Hey Chris...Howz it goin?...

DON'T TOUCH ME.

Drunk Dude: Hey man...lighten up, it a party!...

I DON'T KNOW YOU.

Drunk dude: Come on...You know you wanna party!...

GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME.
*walks away*

Hm? Who is this...*spots a chick*

Chick: *winks*

Oh yeah...*walks over*

Chick: Why hello big boy...

Hello...

Chick: wanna go in the car and...do a little dance?

Hey what's with the deep voice...

Chick: come on..you know you want me..

HEY YOUR SCARING ME...*backs away*

Chick: Come here...BUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRPP....

OH MY GOD...SHE'S A...A MALE SHE!!!!
*runs out of bar*

Drunk Dude: Hey Chris! Where ya goin?...They're mixin up fruit cocktail!...

I DON'T KNOW YOU!!!*runs away*

Drunk Dude: What a sad, sad life...*sips beer*